Su Ann's 18th Birthday

Su-Ann is 18!! So upon her request we traveled to One Utama, Damansara and organized a large scale dinner. Though it was very last minute, most people made it. It was the 100th (exagerated) birthday celebration for the month. But it never gets stale. What else was there to say except that we probably saw too much of each other in this one week.

All in all we always have a blast. The food was good and the company was great. We are at that age in time. I remember the days when we look up to the young adults in church and figured they were quite happening ( I was a kid then). Now we've actually reached that age. The happening yuppies group, also known as the marriageble age. Guess it IS a cool age. Hahah what else can I say? *smile*

Church Camp 05

It was that time of the year again as we geared up and packed our bags and headed to the mountain top. We were all excited to see what God was going to do and excited to spend much-needed time away from the world and with each other. This year round too I was much more expectant. I was no longer downcast and burdened by things I needed and should be doing. I also brought along my laptop and books in hope that I will some how some way find time to get things done. Big surpirse I never did. When will I learn?

The camp itself was refreshing... Renewed in mind, spirit and soul. We were challenged to get out of our complacency and reached for God. Stir it up in our hearts Lord! Stir up your church that we will long after you like the deer pants for water. You are the air we breathe. Being the official photographer I got to see many antics. What is the most touching picture one can take? Knowing the answer and feeling the need I got off my knees and started snapping. Lord you long to see your people worshipping you. A soul that cries out desperately for God, a family that prays together, a church that worships at your throne, a nation that on their knees. People of God the time has come for us to come back to the living God. The best pictures in the world are that of a people that are not afraid to cry out to God. Some of those pictures I've uploaded in my multiply site. What do I want to see after this? I want to be more desperate for God.

This year we also see a strong rise of young adults in this church. There are so many of us after all. YES we are young adults. I'm a young adult!! We spent days and nights together. Laughing mostly - so hard in fact that our stomachs ached. We played cards, taboo, and God knows what else. We spent so much time together that it felt like yesteryears. We even sacrificed sleep for it. Who's bright idea was it anyway? Sometimes in the midst of it I'll feel slightly guilty for not mixing with the kiddos instead. But aunty Jo reminded me that I can't put all the burden on myself. I cannot forgo my entire life either. I have a life I need to live too. It's not that I neglected all else, I just made time to allow my life to go on. What did I learn through this? I need to socialise with people my age as well... to live to grow.In the course of this camp, I learnt a lot of things. For example how to catch a person when he/she is slain. (I learnt this the hard way) I have injured my back because I was not able to catch people properly and thus them landing on me. Heal me O Lord! I have found much things too. Like renewed friendship as well as made new ones. The list goes on.... But all in all God be the glory forever and ever. Praise His name all ye children, shout unto the Lord.

Check out the pics!

Praise ReporFor

The past week has been a potentially stressful one for me. On Monday I was feeling the stress filling my breathing space. Headache came, sleepless nights came.... and I began to fear. Fear that the stress would eat me whole. Swallow me. I didn't want the monster in me (which is the product of stress) to surface at work. Somehow I took for granted friends in church who bore all my nonsense all this while. So I got down on my knees and pray............

I was supposed to organize this Treasure Hunt event for the students and staff members in my college and I was begining to feel the stress of organizing as usual. I thank God first of all that I've had all these experience from serving in church. I also want to thank God that I DID NOT, i repeat DID NOT get stressed up or any headache at all....... until the event was over, and suddenly the migraine came. But anyway the event itself was quite an event, if i can say so myself. Sure I was dead tired preparing and running all over the place, sure there were problems here and there (I've learnt that you just can't be prepared for everything. that everything that can go wrong will go wrong) but the team spirit showed before and during the event was amazing. It touched my heart to see them working together in unity. It moved my heart to see so many of them showing up. I count it a success if just each person gets to know one other person. I was really contented at the end of the event. I thank God that it didn't rain and there was no haze and it was not hot. I thank God that most if not all was happy about the event. yayyyy!! i dont actually care so much if my boss dont like (but they do), I care more bout how the students feel. For more pics check out my multiply site. Hheeheh... below pic... gaya only.

Second thing praise report is that we now have a part time Indon maid that will clean once a week or somthing like that. YAYYY. Thank God!! Don't need to do so much housework liow... Less one headache!!

Yay church camp starts tomorrow... Need to pack now! Thank God for this break..

My Birthday!!

August 12 (Fri)

It's finally my birthday!!! I was so excited. For some crazy reason I love my birthdays! Maybe because it makes me feel special. Maybe because for once I can be in the limelight (something I normally shy away from). Yet I don't ask for much. Every year on my birthday, I only want to be happy. Fully and totally. 24hours. Just to be with the people I love and to know that they love me... is enough to make my heart soar.

This year I started the day (at midnight) happy. But my heart started to drop soon after. Lav and gang was in Genting that night (yes they called) but I was beginning to wonder what I was doing here. I would have been there too if I hadn't come back to Seremban. A part of me still wants to be there. I know I'm doing the right thing being here.. .some how... yet I still have a part of me that wants, yearns, desires. Sometimes doing the right thing is so hard.

Sleep was not kind that night, thus my morning quite ruined. I was too tired to do much work though there was lots to do. My students had their final but taking a peek at their answers I was quite visibly disappointed, which my students actually apologized for. However, I had lunch with the class and they bought me a cake. I also got a teddy bear and pen from them. How sweet! Most of my colleague did not know it was my birthday though till I LOA-ly told them. HAhahaha!!~ Bee Ling and Azura knew and gave me something. It was so sweet. I applied to go home earlier that day. No point spending my birthday time at work *wink*

I got back to cook up an Italian feast with Su-Ann's help. I actually started getting a little stressed up as the time drew closer till my friends from college arrived (students and colleague). My mom was there to help too and they chased me out of the kitchen at 6+ so that I could bath and they could clear up. Thank God my friends arrived late (though I wished they hadn't cos that gave us no time to socialize after dinner). And my 'kai sai lo' made it!! They were all very sweet. And since most of them had never tasted these food, they found it nice.... hahahah!~ I never got to do any tasting actually. I was too worn out to eat. But Su-Ann, you go girl!! We had to look into many details as my friends were quite diversified. There was a vegetarian, seafood allergy, and so on...

We had combine cell that night. And my darling friends purposely turned up for me... Feel so happy. Cell still went on though I tried to explain to my friends (from college) that this was no party. Plus, I led cell tonight. Unfortunately some of those friends could not stay for long or did not understand half of what I was saying. Ohyes, I had two cakes that night. But of course we only used one. I was covered with hands and prayer which is one of the wonderful blessings you receive on your birthday.

(There's some reflection on my face according to the picture. Eeee....)

Anyway, I was plainly exhausted when all was said and done. And when the night came, I craved for my bed. I jus wanted to sleep. Zzzz....

Ohya I did not get the bouquet of flower I had hoped for. Oh well...

Aug 13 (Sat)

Racing agaisnt time after Aspirers' Cottage Fellowship @ Pang's Residence (which went very well thank God! and thank you to all leaders who put effort into it. I did not had to lift a finger this time around), we hurried over to Kensington (without bathing) to dine. Most of us were max-ed out from tea. Myself, I had lunch at 3pm, tea at 5pm and dinner at 7pm. I still could eat though, slowly. Anyway dinner was with a whole bunch of people.

Though I thought that I would have been happy, I wasn't. Maybe because I was again tired. Maybe because the group was too big and I never was good at socializing in huge groups. Maybe I wasn't getting the attention I wanted. Mayb I fel overshadowed. Maybe my thoughts were elsewhere. Maybe a hundred and one maybes. But I was just not happy.

----------------------------------------------------------------

I've given up on trying to be exceedingly and perfectly happy. Because there's no such thing. Circumstances in life will always toy with our emotions. There's never an end to feelings. It's a rollercoaster ride. The key is to learn to be contented no matter what. True joy flows only from God. Only God can give that perfect satisfaction despite our circumstances in life. Only God and God alone....

Happy Birthday to you~

This month is a month of birthdays.. many many... So here goes to being 'pokkai'. I haven't even bought presents for any one who's birthday fell in these last two weeks yet. No time. Forgive me!!

Thursday (Aug 4) Lavinia's 22nd Bday
Traveling up all the way from Seremban to the heart (yes i mean the HEART) of Kuala Lumpur's TGI Friday. Thank's to Kin Sang's map I did not get lost! With a group of 14 people in attendence on a very long table, it was quite a party. Fortunately, they put us in one corner of the restaurant to make all the noise we want.

The food was good. I tried a bit of almost everyone's. (hahahah) and decided i would have loved Lavinia's Jack Daniel's. Apparently TGIF has improved over the past few years and it would definitely be worth visiting once in a blue moon. The price was a killer. I can't remember the last time I paid so much for food. I really can't. For a drink I had this Friday's Freeze: orange sherbert plus vodka (my first vodka and no it wasn't enought to get you drunk). Of course I had expected a much fancier glass (pic). Oh yes, the mud pie was heavenly.

At the end of dinner TGIF staff members made Lavi stand on two chairs (with our prompting) and they sang a barely understandable Birthday song after which she was forced to blow her candle with the cake at almost two arm's length away. Yea, that was funny. But you were lovin' it weren'y you, darling? hahaha... Neways "these are the days of our lives". For more pictures, log on to my multiply site or Hazel's blog.

Friday (Aug 5) Alexis 22nd Birthday
He went to Kota Kinabalu.. so a bit relieved. hehehe

Saturday (Aug 6) Yi Khai's 21st Birthday Celebration
Dear cousin Yi Khai's Birthday is actually on the 7th but we had to celebrate it earlier becos of our grandma's celebration the day after (refer below). Neways... Khai you're now a legal citizen (wohoo!!) Yayyy for fishy!! A few of us went to Barney's (in Kemayan Square) to celebrate. They have nice alfredo and Ceasar Salad there bytheway. Elaine and me being the only two girls got quite lost upon topics like Dota and Eutopia.... *sigh* After dinner we stood in the haze for quite a bit until the guys got seemingly a bit high. The haze situation is pretty bad people.. stay indoors!! We continued the celebration in Curry Leaf. Don't ask me why man... I was full.

I learnt a lot bout Dota and Eutopia though.

And we sang Yi Khai the birthday song ... twice (one in barney's one in Regent)





Sunday (Aug 7) Grandma's 80th Birthday Celebration
So after church, the entire... well almost all... family (plus Unc.Keong's side) gathered at Regent to have a feast. It was good to see everyone and just enjoy each other company. We stuck with out own group, quite unwilling to mix tables actually... probably cause we love our own company? or we really just miss hanging out with each other. I mean we only gather like this twice a year: chinese new year and ah mah's birthday.

This bowl of Shark's fin soup was for Winne but Zhong Xiang finished it. But I managed to take a picture of it. I forgot however to take a picture of ah mah or the cake. What a dungu. the cake was beautifulllllll. I picked it out and was afraid it will be frowned at but it was LOVED!! It's a chocolate and cheese semi-spheric mousse cake. Delicious~ I can still taste it in my mouth.....



Other than that:



Tuesday (Aug 9) Leonard & Valerie's 21st Birthday
Will sms them lor...

Maid-less

Two days ago, my maid announced that she was pregnant. After a trip to the agency and a pregnancy test, it proved true. Imagine our horror and shock. My family has had a long histroy of maids (with both parents working all day we simply have no choice) we've never had any problems. God has been good to us to prevent any sort of hanky panky or trouble. He's protected my household all this while and still does. But imagine our shock when we heard that news. Packing her stuff we immediately sent her on her way.

Now we are officially maid-less while awaiting the new batch of maids to arrive, hopefully before Lynne's 16th birthday in November. Thing's would be harder if she were already 16 (govt regulation). The last two days were spent organizing and clearing and all the things you can imagine we need to do. We now have to make our own bed, sweep and mop (dont want so often la), feed and bath the dog (lynne's job), wash plates, do the laundry..... the list is endless!! Oh man.... Can you imagine us sisters doing housework??? argh!! Yes I admit we're like princess. At least winne and I has had our share of housework - living in college and away from home before. We all have to wake up earlier now. Coming back from work does not mean lazing now. My dear mummy does a lot of housework. poor mummy.

SO please pray for us.... especially when lynne has to be home alone sometimes. Even though we've got 4 noisy dogs at home.... But all in all I have a lot to thank God for:

1) Winne was back when all this happened. Helps with settling down a lot.

2) My dogs are behaving. They get into their cages just with one simple gesture obediently.

3) My maid did not run away or steal anything. She came clean.

4) This happen to THIS maid at THIS time. If we were any younger it would have been difficult. or if Lynne was having PMR or SPM this year.

To God be the glory. But please pray for us... It still is going to be quite a struggle.

The Return of the Headache~

The veins in my head are pumping.... steadily... in rythm. The sounds around me is aplified and echos in my head. The temperature in my body rises significantly. My cornea enlarges above normal and lights become too bright. The liquid in my medula oblongata is no longer stable. I struggle to remain alright.

I thank God that through it all, I was still able to stand, to work, to see, to walk. Wishing the day was over sooner did not help the headache go away. Why did I not take the panadol? I believed I could still hold. But even after a reasonable nap back home, the headache remained. And I had no other choice but to resolved to the wretched pill.

But now I am better. Better to live another day. Lord if you are willing, take this headache from me. Though it is but a mere dullness and throbbing it has irritated me long enough. Free me from this cursed spell. Free my family from this bondage... Into your hands I commit my whole family and myself.

P/s: picture by David Yeow

M.A.D.

What is M.A.D.? When I was in college, the CF has a theme "Are You M.A.D.?" Basically stands for "Are You Making A Difference?" It was a challenge to Christian youths to stand out and make a difference, be a lighthouse, salt of the earth. As Christians, we represent Christ to the unbelievers. Jesus made a difference in His day and so should we. Our life should be different because of Him who now live in us. Thus, our attitude, our character, our speech, our actions, everything should stand out of the crowd to inspire and bring hope to the hopeless.

What is M.A.D.? It is a challenge to make a difference if you have not. Sometimes we feel insignificant, unworthy and incapable to make any difference. Rebuke that in the name of Jesus!! We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us! If God is for us, who can be against us? We were called for a very special purpose. No matter what ministries we are called into, our main purpose is to touch lives - lives are what matters most to God. Not technicality, not red tapes, not methods, but LIVES!!

So are you M.A.D.? I vowed to devote my life to make a difference. Everyday. I pray that I will be God's hands and feet here on earth to touch those He love. This is my sacrifice of praise to Him. No matter where we are now we can make a difference by being faithful to our task, by doing our best to serve others as well as God, by doing what is right over what is the majority, by standing for what we believe, by being a good friend, by honouring our Sabbath day, by honouring the authorities and our parents, by caring and loving others, by so many other ways. We can shine for Jesus! It was by His grace that we are here today. Let's honour God together by telling other's about Him with the way we live!

So are you M.A.D.?

Approved in Every Way

Approved in Every Way

(Ps. Wah Lok, FGT)

I want to be your servant Lord

To serve you each and everyday

I want to give my best to You

Approved in every way

Make my life a living sacrifice

The way You want me to be

To serve you with all my heart

Whatever the cost to me

Take me, break me, mold me Lord

As the potter shapes the clay

Pleasing You in all I do

Approved in every way

I'll stand before your righteous throne

To hear "Thou good and faithful one"

"Well done" from my Master's lips

Approved in every way

May this be our prayer.... Lord, that whatever the cost, we will seek to live for You the way You want us to live. That we may seek to please You and not men.

Picture speaks a Thousand words

This week has been quite a happening weekend. Thus, to put it into words would be too much, or just too boring. But I'm partially glad that it's been so happening. What would life be without the small joys and troubles that come along the way - making life colourful. We just gotta open our eyes to see it.. it IS right before us. Yet we choose to look elsewhere for our very own definition on how life should be - thus getting depressed and disappointed. God has given it to us on a silver platter. Life comes with both bitter sweet.

Oh right, the updates:

Thursday

So last week Sunny tore his ligament while playing basketball. Don't ask how. Apparently he jumped and it fell out of place. So comes another car from Nilai (yet another year) to Seremban Columbia Hospital. This seems to be an annual thing. The hospital visits, I mean, not Sunny tearing ligaments.

Despite the pain, Sunny is still laughing. His name suites him, doesn't it? Along with him, comes ol' faithful Ken (I just talked nice about you la Ken) and Shanti (the driver this round).

Thank God for Dr. Thong right? So hope you get better Sunny, so that you can walk and slam dunk again.




Friday

And here we have two ACS brothers (not biological). They would tell me it's called "heng tai" or something or rather. My cantonese is improving exponentially because of these two. Half of the nonsense they utter out I don't even understand. But I'm learning.. slowly but surely. One day I will be able to speak fluently too... without breaks... with right pronunciations.

Oh yes, this is lunch... and I do so prefer side view

Saturday

We actually gathered some IMU students for dinner at Central but only a few turned up. No matter my dear cousins Andrew and Elaine were back from the kiasu land. Good socialling night. Something I seldom do at such a .... ermm... I don't have a word for it. But it's indeed interesting, refreshing....

Saw fantastic four after that. And I have a small question. The movie and the vcd doesn't tie in... Hmmm.... That is strange. There was this part (in the vcd) where Reed tried to kiss Susan (after their date at the Planeterium) and she went invisible. I didn't see that in the cinema.

Oh Elaine trying to act cute. Fortunately Elaine barely weigh anything, so the horse is quite safe. But there were some adults staring at us. (at the arcade next to T1 cinema, waiting for show time)

Oh yes since i remember:

HAPPY 18th BDAY FLORANCE CHONG
It's today!

the passion

The passion burns within
Like the beating of your heart
Like the heat of burning coal
Like the warmth of winter's fire
Like the radiance of a full moon

Passion without words
Just tears
Passion without face
Just an inspiring spirit
Passion without sound
Just a familiar song

Passion...
Seen through actions
Seen through deeds
Seen through living
Seen through communing

Seen
Recognised
Desired

Genting

Yesterday my family (with adopted sister Yeh Ying) took a day trip to Genting to visit Winne. It's been a long time since we took a family trip. Was really relaxing. Sure not everything went so smoothly but it was still good. It's how we see it. For some pictures (which is available on my Multiply site) click here.

For the first time I went against my long-fear against rides and took some of them without thinking. Almost went on Space shot too, but after staring at how high the thing goes, I decided otherwise. Don't need to have that kinda adrenaline rush. But despite everything, I enjoyed myself. It's been a long time since.....

Night Out

As promised here are the pictures of this evening's dinner. For the first time I allowed myself to mix business with pleasure. But I guess it's all as well. I had begun to realised that business, after all, isn't just business. Life is meant to live as a whole, not in parts. Everything we do makes us who we are. There are no parts. God accepts us as a whole, not as parts. That is why he asks for our whole heart. Lord, take mine whole. The picture below is uniquely a combination of colleague and students. Well I am giving them tutorial classes so in a sense, wouldn't you say? Oh by the way, guys, if you're taking the time to read this, i had to edit the picture. All I did was changed a bit of brightness and color contrast. No worries. I did not add any moustache on anyone or anything like that.

I suppose I'm gonna promote the eatery too. Photo was take at a new restaurant-like place off Seremban Garden (apparently called Forest heights) at the new commercial blocks near the twin roundabout. A little isolated but I wouldnt say desolated. The owner took a couple of short courses a Etica, thus the connection. However, the food is interesting enough to try. The environment friendly enough and delightful. Find out for yourself, eh? Oh yes name of restaurant.... it escapes me... it starts with 'T' and directly translated from chinese would be "Good good food"

Ah yes more pictures... the newspaper act.. is what Hazel calls 'sampat-ness'. Apparently it's cause I can't read the chinese characters. Here's to bananas. Nah we don't wear pajamas.















A little bit of sepia effect to add to the taste. Gives it a 'feel' doesn't it? Like it? Sorry guys, I was too lazy to edit the colors. It is a PDA after all.. color quality aint the top priority in specs.

Ah now, ah Heng and his handphone is most irritating. Otherwise our lady here would have been time traveled back into the 70s with that kinda background.

That was about the time my PDA ran out of battery. So much for the guys enthusiasm for 'Mummy Maze'... which was quite commendable actually. I was impressed. Elaine if you ever come across this... he beat you flat girl. One last post... my colleague Bee Ling. Some of you have already met her at the Reuben Morgan concert at EFC the other night. She has the softest, nicest heart I have ever come across. If you wanna talk about going the extra mile here's a perfect example. I could use her in Aspirers up and coming trainings.

There's something to learn from people around us everyday. There will never be a day where we learn nothing. If we just open up our eyes and hearts... we'll see. If people stopped learning, we'll stop growing. I guess we grow from learning. And learning truly never ends.

So guys, here are the pics. Leave me a note so I know you've seen the pics. I decided to post it tonight itself. Might forget another day. So how do you like your faces splattered all over the Internet? I'm suiciding here. The hours have gone far beyond reasonable and thus ruin my morning.. yet again. No regrets though. (Except that I still have not done much about my research project)

Cheers people. We'll have another round soon. Enjoy!~

p/s: Lian, I still have not tried the resizing thing.. Honestly I still am not that clear.

Piano Skeleton

Just a quick one. Piano is finally tuned. I promise I will practice my chords that I may serve in banging the pianos in cell. If it helps even the least I want to try. And I could use it to worship God myself. Anyway the baby grand in my home is what you called ancient. Has been around for generations (no not my family's). It is literally antique, says the piano tuner. A fragile little thing that could snap and fall apart one day. But it withstand the times!! Good old' piano. I managed to catch a snapshot of its inerts. I've never seen it before. This is how a piano really looks like inside!! Wow to the amount of work. No wonder it's a masterpiece - one greatly admired. I'm talking bout pianos in general now.

Rain rain

It's raining it's pouring
The old man is snoring
Went to bad and he bump his head
And he couldn't get up in the morning

On Sunday, we prayed for rain... That the damps will fill and the draught will end. On Sunday evening, rain poured like it never have for a long time. And it went on to Monday... Tuesday.. and everday!! It rained and it poured!! Praise the LORD!! The damp is filling... the damp is filling. Despite the inconvenience, it is worth it if we can have water again. And thus, monsoon season has arrived. either kinda late or too early.. this year.

On other news... my dogs has been howling very weirdly these few nights. I don't mean wolf cry. It's really weird. I think maybe Coco misses her puppies (all sold) but I'm not entirely sure. I certainly don't see anything outside that she might be ... ahem.. howling or doing whatever she's doing. Maybe it's crying in sadness.. Yea maybe. But then she didnt act that way in the evening. She's perfectly normal. I mean this is not her first time, she should know by now. Hmmm....

Ancient of Days

Am actually back blogging. I was at Nang Hong cos Li Lin wanted to get a recorder. Lo and behold I stared at the lock to the recorder showcase. I have never seen anything like it. It is so old that no one ever uses them anymore. It's ancient! It belongs in the museum of machines or something. I didnt get to take a picture of the key which was quite something as well.Oh yes, there was an old check printing machine as well. I remember seeing my mom used it when I was a kid. And I saw it again. It's really cool... Seeing how technology has grown to what it is now. Also scary when you realised how close we're getting to the end times. Was all foretold.At night I was hooked on watching Sister At. Even though rotten tomatoes rated it otherwise, its an amazing show. And the music.. woh...Know why? Cos it shows of a women who stick through and made a difference because she believed. The nuns and all weren't all that good to show about what Christians really are. Kinda putting down. But I guess that's how the world sees it.

Enclosed, naive...

Whoopi Goldberg.. my new role model. No not her!!! But what she stood for in the film. She stood as someone willing to make a difference. She was faithful to friends, she believed in helping the students go beyond what they thought they could. She made a difference wherever she went. Because she believed in the good in people. I keep thinking of my students and what I wanted to be - a teacher who cared, who took the time to know her students... so that she could make a difference. That's all I want. My decisions all centered around that simple theme. My heart for the young.

I don't know if I'm doing that. One thing I know is that I'm not doing as much as I'd like to be. I see my colleague and think she's doing more. Sometimes I wonder if God picked correctly. Seeing the person I am, I laugh to myself, at myself. Who am I kidding? My heart's desire is to make a difference among the younger generation.. well i'm still young too. But I want to be a light, be the salt. I don't know if I can. I doubt I'm worthy enough. But I wanna do what I can.

Lord use me to do thy bidding. I am Yours. Bound by vow I surrender to You. Use me to lead and serve Your children. To call them back into Your arms. Your hands, scarred for them, still reaching out to them, in everlasting love.

*How do you resize the pic?

Seremban has started her water rationing today. We'll be experience alternate days water cut according to the zones mentioned above (courtesy of thestar). The rationing started today with Zone1 where we'll have water today and none tomorrow and so on. Read more here

We've already bought big tumblers (price shot up by the way) and filled to the brim with water to stock up for dry days. Drinking waters, bathing water, washing up water. So STOCK UP NOW Seremban folks! We're going through tough and smelly times.

Rain poured from heaven yesterday and today. We prayed for God to send rain to fill our damps. Let's believe that God will provide water. Let's continue to pray for His hands of provision to send rain everyday till the damp is once again well pass the safe zone. Let's believe.

Misery

Tears are falling, hearts are breaking
How I need to hear from God

Some days, some moments, some nights... I feel my heart break.. So much care I've given to hold it together. So many ttimes I've prayed that God you remove this thorn. Heal this wound. The pain never really goes away. The scar remains forever. And there is no reason... None that God is giving now.

Lord I cant stand this misery. There is yet any explanation. Speak to me Lord, that I may hear your voice. Still the raging storm. Calm the troubled waters. Silent the roaring winds. Help me sleep in peace through it all. I am Yours.

My puppy

It was sad and shocking at the same time to come down for breakfast and given the news of the death of one of the puppies. Of the long history my family has delivered puppies, never has a single one died at over a month old. The rest were born dead. So how could this happen? The cause was quickly studied and analyzed.

If my maid had warned us earlier about the puppies purging, we would have treated it then. If only we had spent more time with them, we'd have noticed. ARGH!! It's so frustrating to heart breaking to look at the puppies body covered with hovering flies. What's with the flies? How long was it dead? It's bad enough that we've had the worst cleaner in the history of maids. But to have a body hovering with flies and God-knows what else! Horrifying! Mortifying! I mean they are the cutest puppy on earth. Yes! according to me.

On other news, my ex lady boss called me. It being the first company I officially worked in, I still have some sentiment for them. The conversation went something like this:
"Where are you working now?"
"Seremban lor"
"Eh not Serdang?"
"No ah, I said I'm coming back to Seremban what"
"So happy ah?"
"OK lah"
"Want to come back not?"
"Errrr no lor... "
"Why la?"
"I'm serious bout what I said when I resigned lor"

And so I am.

The Crossroad

My life as it is, hangs in the air. Breathlessly awaiting, awaiting....

Standing at a crossroad, looking down both lanes, wondering which to take. The end is the same but which shall i take? Neither smooth yet they are not the same. But which shall I walk down? Choices choices. So many choices. If only GOd told me directly I need not choose. Yet I wonder if God did that would i have listened? questions questions. so many questions.

How do you decide? How do you choose? I can safely say this will be one of the most important decisions i'm going to make in my life. And i want badly to do it right. I want desperately. But I just can't be 100% sure. Besides, I dont got much guts. Just plenty of passion....

Lord, grant me the wisdom to know Your Will. Grant me the assurance that You will indeed lead. Guide me Lord and I will follow. Show me Lord and I will go. Surely Your goodness and mercies will follow me all the days of my life. Speak to me God and let me hear Your sweet voice. Tell me Lord. Shut the wrong doors that I may know. Into Your hands I commit myself.

Please pray for me. That God will just.... i dunno la.. I need to know.

(the picture is from some church's promo on something. i think it's really cool)