Flowers by the roadside

You know how you drive along the same road seeing the same sights every single day. And after a while, you tune out to not have to deal with the monotony. Perhaps like me, once in a while, you take a different route home. Just to change the scenery. But how many routes home are there?

Do we tend to take for granted when monotony sets in? Do you accept the drone or do you do something to change it? I can take monotony better than most people. I don't actually get bored if I had to eat the same food over and over again. Not really anyway. But at the same time, I can't stand monotony and drone. It's weird I know. I'm torn between two kinds of personality.

But perhaps it's the little things along the way that breaks the monotony or makes it worthwhile. Like a simple word of 'thanks', or 'you made a difference in my life', or spring colored flowers in the middle of a dreary road (which you had never noticed before), or a long-overdue dinner with those closest to your heart. God is so good. I think we all need it.


What's yours? I hope you have yours.

ayam percik on bread

After the fishing trip [pics] with the college group, I arrived home at almost 11pm with ayam percik and chickpeas in hand. The chicken itself was cold and looking miserable. So for dinner I decided to make myself a little sandwich. You won't believe I have learned to like raw tomato slices in my sandwiches. It was enough to fill my stomach though.

I should have fried an egg too.

Fishing!

It was so long ago that the memory feels like a dream. Perhaps a dream from a distant past or a wishful thinking. Nevertheless, my childhood diary records that it did indeed take place.

Standing knee deep in water as the waves continuously laps the shore, I remember watching the sun fall off the horizon. We were fishing with a family friend and I was a little worried that the fishes might get hurt. I couldn't imagine the cruelty that we were inflicting on the fishes.

"But you eat fish what," my dad reminded me. Hmm... indeed I do. But I did not have to witness it.

There was a small wooden jetty just on our right where a big pail was to put the fishes that we caught. Of course I was too small to throw a line so all I did was stand there. Beyond that, I could not remember a thing. There was something about a big turtle that I think my sister encountered. For the life of me, I have no idea what happened after that.

But I got a chance to fish for real this time. The college group rolled off to P.D. to try our hands on fishing. Some couldn't stand waiting so long (although only 10minutes had passed). Some were totally freaked out by the live worms (they say it could bite). Some took every opportunity to look cool holding a fishing rod. And of course, some actually caught a fish. Some fish.

the limitations of my craft

I was making some craft to minister to some kids at a school. This is what I came up with. It's rather limited but it's interesting to me. The yellow card says 'Jesus' and the orange card says 'help'.



Just another addition to my 'Jack of (many) trades and master of none'. heh.

Boris

Meet Boris - The doll that sits in ETC's Persona.
Isn't he just adorable?



How could you say he is not?

BCM Music Fest

Last nite, BCM had it's 5oth Anniversary Music Festival, with a line up of excellent singers. Here are a few videos for those who missed it. Story here.

1. the one and only Juwita Suwito.



2. Forgot her name but she was very entertaining for those who understands cantonese.



3. But the best was at the end, when everyone came out and sang the chorus 'How Great Thou Art' together. There is no concert in the world that compares to hearing a gathering of Christ-followers giving praise where it is rightfully due. It's not just the singing. It's the worship that reminds you of the God you are singing to.



Enjoy!~

Another phail!

Here's another one...

Was at the new Old Town Kopitiam near Terminal 2, and saw a rather interesting order.



But this is what really came instead... -_- It never is like the pictures, is it?



However, it tasted awesome and now I like half boiled eggs with toasted bread so much!

McDonald's blooper

I realized this is defaming but since it did happen...

ETC and I decided to order McDs for lunch - I had a craving and besides its convenient when it gets delivered to your office. I ordered Double Cheese Burger while ETC ordered Spicy McDeluxe. The receipt got it right. I paid right. But look what came in instead: (in case you can't see that's Quarter Pounder and McChicken) ETC was disappointed and well intolerent to mayonaisse but I actually got a better deal)

Did I mentioned the box was also squashed and our fries were soggy. Hmm...

Should I have reported it or something? How do I do that?

Jesus the Carpenter

Came across this... Be blessed!



Here's another... I cried! (wanna use this some how one day)

Aspirers Camp 2010

Aspirers Camp 2010: Let It Shine

26-28th February 2010
Golden Straits Villa, P.D.
Ps. Gideon Lee

A trip down memory lane...
It feels like a million lightyears away yet fresh in my mind the first aspirers camp I ever coordinated. Of course, then, we called in aspirers retreat. Back then also, I almost killed myself executing the camp. I remember it was in Peace Haven, Genting. And I remember getting sunburns and a migraine. I had every detail of the camp on my fingertips and I drove myself to give more than all. The camps that followed wasn't all that different. I was young and I thought I was superwomen.

Passing it on...
For some years now, we've been appointing younger and younger committees to take up the responsibility and ownership of camp. We believe in training the younger generation and empowering them with positions. Of course, there were many moments of disappointments for me. Sometimes I wondered if it's because my standards were high but then again what challenge could there possibly be if the standards were not high? But as the older members start to disappear, raising the younger ones got more urgent.

The difference this time...
This time I was starting to feel my age catch up. I'm serious. And it's not funny. I need to find a way to keep my energy up cos youth ministry will always require that. And fore seeing more people leaving, I knew it was now or never. They had to rise up! I was more frustrated than ever. Oh God, I prayed, plant a sense of ownership in their heart and a burden for this ministry! There was no other way.

And I think that did it. I think they sensed it too. During the final stretched pre camp and during the camp, I saw the leaders and committee begin to pull their weight. Without much complain or whining. They were growing up. I knew it was time to let go and just trust them. And so I did. And as I was told, they would amaze me. Although I did breakdown into tears thinking too ahead of myself and fearing the inevitable, yes the inevitable, fearing I won't have the strength I need, fearing it won't work out cos of my failure to raise the younger generation.


And then God spoke...
Have you ever had moments in your life that you absolutely need (want) to hear something from God? It was that for me. I've felt that He's been too silent about a lot of things that I was beginning to loose my way. I needed to know. So when Ps. Gideon gave me the word from God and it totally hit home, I could not take it anymore. There was no way he could have known what I've been talking to God about. (I'm of course not about to tell you ;) what it's about) But I'm still trying to digest some of it and trying to hang on to His promises.

It gave me some assurance and peace about areas in my life. And it reminded me again how much God loves me though I cannot imagine why. And it was oh so important to me knowing that He saw me and knows me and was there when I thought He'd forgotten me. That was me. This isn't going to be just another mountain experience. I'll keep it close to my heart and I'll carry on for as long as He needs me to. I will be strong and brave and won't turn back.

What about you?

Psalm 94:18-19

When I said, "My foot is slipping,"
your unfailing love, Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me,
your consolation brought me joy. Psalm 94:18-19

Repeat that again. Yea and again and again.

God, even when I forget you and attempt to do life in my own strength, when I fall... it is YOU, O Lord, who is upholding me with your right hand. You won't let me fall apart. When my mind is clouded by anxiety and my heart crowded with worry... it is You who give me strength, ideas, wisdom, and everything else.... holding me together in one piece. I look to You and recognize that it is You, O Lord - my Salvation.

Happy CNY!

It's that season again... where uncles and aunties ask me the important question in their mind... "when?" I guess it's a 'right' for an aunt and uncle. And I've learnt to say "soon" to stop them short of pursuing to ask why or give some kind of advise about what I should do about it. This year tho, one uncle tried a different comment, "you girls need to hurry up, it's getting expensive". Hmm...

I actually enjoy entertaining... I'd like to think I'm a decent hostess most of the time. You wouldn't guess that I'm actually an introvert. But this year I went overboard thinking I was some heroine... young one. With camp around the corner and plenty of family obligations on my hand, I was driven to exhaustion. I didn't get to really hang out with friends as I would have prefered. I barely even left my house. =( sigh. my brains were screaming that I stop.
Oh and I have to record our Tan family's first ever CNY get-together. We decided that our generation had to do something to keep the family together. And so we had our first our BBQ session at my place. Master Chef Kwok, Asst Chet Cat and Asst Chef Ming were hard at work making sure we were not short on food to fill our tummy. Although I almost fainted from exhaustion, I think this was a good start to something big. Some things are worth fighting for. Some things are worth exhausting yourself over, right?


Updates: (on 28th Feb - chap goh meh)
After returning for camp, we hear that our family has decided to take a trip up to Genting to watch the fireworks for Chap Goh Meh. Without mentioning the delay and the crowd and getting lost... we did manage to catch a glimpse of the fireworks... And I tested my camera power on it.

Happy Chinese New Year people and have a roaring year ahead!

Drying up like a prune

I was coerced into seeing a dermatologist about my acne condition. i didn't think it was that crucial but at the same time. I might want nice skin too.Age does that to you. This is a bottle of my pills for one month. Apparently I need to be on it for 6 months or so.


Doctor: You'll experience dryness and bleeding on your lips.
Me: *ouch* ok
Doctor: just use lip moisturizer will do. I'll put one in the pack for you.
Me: ok i can deal with that.
Doctor: are you getting married anytime soon?
Me: What?
Doctor: are u engaged or anything like that?
Me: Erm no...
Doctor: Alright. Remember that you should not get pregnant during the course of this medication. It will deform your baby.
Me: Just during the course of medication right? after that no prob right?
Doctor: RIght. But remember DON'T get pregnant.
Me: Trust me, I won't
Doctor: (after explaining other stuff) remember don't give anyone that might get pregnant and be very careful that you don't get pregnant!
Me: I really won't.
My mom: She doesn't even have a boyfriend lah!
Me: -_-"

So here I am, dry and skin itching. Slight bleeding and stuff. Sigh. It's quite irritating.

my new toy and american idol

After much contemplation, I decided to get a new camera. But as usual, I took too long to contemplate. Fortunately for me, I have friends who put me on the right path and doesn't understand hesitation and delay. So I was on my way up to KL... to get my camera. Thanks friends. =)



It's a new toy! Should I name it? I got to test out the camera later at Midvalley when we bumped into the live appearance of Kris Allen, American Idol. It was too far and too many people to get a good look.
Nevertheless, I think his photoshoped poster looks better. =)



The crowd was insane. The girls were screaming and the DJs were encouraging them. But I guess all that is needed. However, we did not bother to hang around that long to observe a loooooooooooong line of people going up to get an authograph and try to grab his hands a little longer. hahaha..

Small Smiles

It was one of those nights... days when you feel like you've hit a wall in your life. A whole lump was welling up in my throat heart and I wanted to burst into tears break down or something. I couldn't tell exactly what it was that was pushing me to the edge or causing an emotional upheaval. But then again it isn't new for me. But it was one of those days...

And I had just about to throw something and hope it breaks. Or maybe find an empty hall to yell. Or something. And there was noone to reach out too...

And then driving back, I saw a huge yellow moon bursting out from the sky. It was really really huge. I like moons to begin with. A huge 3/4 moon starring out of the sky was abnormal and absolutely wonderful. You might think I'm crazy but it made my day. I stopped my car a couple of times in the middle of the street, hope no car bangs me, stretched out my arm to take pictures.

This is a bad picture. But can you see the yellow spot that does not look like a street lamp?



But it's funny that at a time like this. It was like a little bone God is throwing at me to keep me happy. It's the small things. That actually did it for me. God you're so cute!

We gotta keep singing after all...

I gotta know how the story ends

A lot of times in life, in my life at least, I see my situation and I want to give up. What's the point of trying so hard when life deals you a bad card. It's unfair. I've been "good" all my life. And sometimes when I look around and I feel like it really doesn't seem to get anywhere. Where's my happy ending? Where's my victory? When can I finally show the very people who have sassed me and my dreams and my life? How long do I have to wait?

There's a show I saw, called 'My Sassy Girl' - a remake of a Korean show. At one part the heroine was held hostage at a closed theme park by a man who had lost his love and had given up on life. She exclaimed that one should never give up even though his love is love cos you need to see how the story ends. It is not over.

As unprofound as the line is, it struck me. Sometimes I wish I can travel 10years into the future to take a peek at my life. I wanna know how it turns out. I wanna stand at the end and look back at the story of my life and understand the plot that has unfolded. Don't you? Every story needs to have an end. We all want our happy endings. We need to know that there is hope that it will end well. We need to continue wanting that.

So we don't give up. We get back on our feet. And we allow the Author to finish the story. We follow His leading and stick with the storyline. Good guys always finish well in the story. So I continue... and pray that my story is gonna have the best kinda of plot for me.

Volunteerism

On the 3rd Sunday of every year, we dedicate all our volunteers to the Lord - praying for them and encouraging them further in their faithful service unto the Lord. This year was no different.

Agape has always had a high volume of volunteers - this time we counted more than half of the congregation. It is encouraging to know that the bulk of the service and ministry does not fall on only a handful of people, although it feels so sometimes. And it is awesome to see youths in ministry at an early age, and senior citizens still faithfully in ministry after all these years.

That night we threw a dinner to appreciate everyone of the volunteers. It was good to see so many people show up and to remind ourselves that we are a team. We are working for one purpose. We are not alone.

So if you're not already serving somewhere in church, I encourage you to find your fit. It helps you feel belong and part of the church. It also exercises the gifts and calling that God has placed in your heart. We're not meant to be islands. God places a destiny and purpose in each of our hearts - there's always something we can do. And it doesn't have to be an existing department. I always say that ministry and serving GOd is more than having a position or task in a certain department in the church organization. Remember, when Jesus walked the earth, He was all about the people - even if it wasn't the norm methods.

Exotic Cars Parade

I had the priviledge to visit Naza World with all its exotic cars lined up for show in its showroom. Generally I would be bored to death, not knowing any value or details of the cars I was seeing. It was to me.. jus a fancy vehicle. But I've heard enough ooohs and aaahs from guys about this car and that that it seem fitting that I should know my cars. I went around the for over an hour to ponder over the luxurious car and ridiculous amount it costs.


Porshe, Wolksvagen, Bentley, Mini Cooper, Peugeot, Limousine, Lexus, and many others. I tried hard to learn up the names and design but as I type this now (another post blog) I realised that I can barely remember nor match the pictures I had taken. Thus, I cannot really label them less I'm sorely mistaken and am pelted by car lovers who are simply apalled at my ignorance. It's harder than I thought. But I will not give up! I do feel priviledge to have admired, touched, and take a picture.

So the above compilation of pictures is dedicated to you car lovers out there!

Bruises again

This rather intrigues me - my 'thin' skin or rather frequent bruises and unidentified marks. Here's another - on both arms. One caused by a big needle.


Note: since this is a post blog, it has since healed completely.

Let Your Light Shine

In recent news, we hear of the arson attempts on churches in the country. News reached international sphere very quickly and all the world is abuzz. More so on home grounds - some were appalled and some were furious. Naturally. It was not our proudest moment. But it may not be the worst of things either.

While people are gripped with concern, fury and fear, churches joint hearts and hands in prayer that God would protect his Church and turn the situation around. We declared that our war was not with flesh and blood but with principalities and power. We fight not with fire but with love and keep our eyes on what's more important. We have an even bigger God and nothing is gonna undermine or change that. I know God is in control and this has not escaped Him. Hold on and watch the God's hands moving this situation around for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purposes.

In Aspirers we declared that we will let our light shine. As we kicked off a new year for the youth group and a new theme that will inspire the rest of the year, we sang our commitments and purpose. We may be young, but we are not helpless. I believe that young people - these young people - can live their lives radically and differently to influence the world. We have a light to shine! And no one lights a candle and hides it under the bed. The candle has been lit. It's time to shine.

Regardless of what we feel today or tomorrow, we can rest assured that God holds our future secure. Will we depend on what does or does not happen to determine what we will or will not do? See... foundations are already being rocked and changes that challenge us to move out of our norm. Let us hold fast to what we belief and know is true. And let us stand firm and shine that light for the world to see.